Funny Story (In French)

I found this little story in Libération, 5th March 2006 (pg 44 "Les Juifs au RMI").

Unfortunately for some, its in French- I have attempted a translation for english speakers!


Une histoire drôle du temps de l'URSS


A Moscou, on annonce: "Demain à 9 heures, distribution gratuite de viande." A 5 heures du matin, la place Rouge est noire de monde. A midi, on annonce: "Moins de viande que prévu, que les Juifs rentrent chez eux." Ils s'en vont. A 15 heures, on annonce: "Moins de viande que prévu, que ceux qui ne sont pas membres du Parti rentrent chez eux." Ils s'en vont. A 20 heures, on annonce: "Moins de viande que prévu, que ceux qui ne sont pas titulaires de l'ordre de Lénine rentrent chez eux." Ils s'en vont. A minuit, on annonce "Il n'y a pas de viande, que tout le monde rentre chez soi." Et le dernier partant dit à son voisin, après cette interminable attente: "Ces Juifs, toujours favorisés".


Translation to English: A funny story from the USSR era.


In Moscow, it is announced "Tomorrow, at 9 o'clock, there will be a free distribution of meat". At 5 o'clock in the morning, Red Square is heaving with people. At midday, it is announced: "There is less meat than expected, please can all Jewish people return to their homes". All the Jewish people leave the Square.

At 3 o'clock in the afternoon, another declaration: "There is less meat than expected, please can all non Party Members return to their homes". All the non-members leave the Square.

Later in the evening, at 8 o'clock, it is declared: "There is less meat than expected, all those not possessing the Order Of Lenin must return home". Those not in posession of the medal are obliged to return.

Finally, at midnight, it is declared "There is no meat, everybody go home!". The last person to leave turns to his neighbour after a seemingly endless wait and says "These Jewish, they're always being favoured aren't they!!".


Admittedly, its better in French than in English.


				

								
				

					
						This entry was posted on Friday, March 10th, 2006 at 2:17 pm						and is filed under Francophone.
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